The Whole Truth


I was recently listening to Bill Lewis’ new CD and I had a thought run through my mind in regards to coaching. A lot of times people want to sit down and be mentored in the business, and at times it can be both rewarding and frustrating for both the mentee and mentor. Tina and I have not achieved significant enough results in the business to be considered mentors. The Launching the Leadership revolution book clearly defines the mentor role beginning at the Leader or Developer of leader levels. I believe that Colby has earned a level of leadership based upon his results in producing leaders, so rightly he can teach/mentor others to do the same.

As much as we all like to assume our greatness, there is a scoreboard that does not lie. Tina and I sit down from time to time to coach a new person in the business, but that is more of an accountability check as opposed to mentoring. The new person may say I need you to motivate me, or I just don’t have a dream, or I had so much happening this week that I did not do anything. And when I hear these statements it puts me on the thin line between friend and coach. Do I provide comforting words of encouragement, or do I tell them the truth?

Jack Nicholson in the movie “A Few Good Men”, made the famous statement that “You can’t handle the truth.” Many times a person may say that they want the truth, but do they really? Do they want you to be a friend or a coach?

A friend would say…

“Maybe next week you will hit Star 500”
“You were busy this week, I know how it is”
“It’s OK, at least you made the contact, call them next Sunday”
“It’s alright to miss a Tuesday open, traffic was bad”
“As high is gas prices are… It OK to get off of System and Cancel Auto-ship”

And to be honest there will be times when we are called to be a friend to those that need friendship. There will be times when life’s curve balls will knock us down and we need encouragement to get up. Friendship should always supersede business, people should come before tasks. But there will be times as a friend where understanding is not what is needed. True friends want to see their friends move forward not wallow in the muck of complacency. True friendship requires an honest and open discussion about our lives to see whether we are using excuses or facing real challenges. Friendship becomes coaching only when one party gives the other permission to tell them the truth. Only then can it be received in the right spirit. A coach would say…

“What are you going to do next week to ensure Star 500”
“You had time to watch the game, and go bowling so why not time for your business?”
“Let’s call the contact now”
“Tuesday is a requirement if you want to grow a B-type business.
“You might have to cancel your cable so that you can afford System and Auto-ship”

A true coach has the responsibility to uncover your hidden potential that has been buried by layers of baggage, abuse, low self esteem, excuses, and fear, in order to help you achieve your goals. True coaches understand the motivating power of the whole truth.

Many of you have heard me mention my football coach Chester Jackson. He and his brother Jesse were probably the two toughest coaches in the area. They accepted no excuses, no explanations. As children our parents had “given” then permission to tell us the whole truth in no uncertain terms. Some may have heard this story before, but it bears repeating. I played middle linebacker and my responsibility on the defense was to be in on every tackle. The system was set up to keep the blockers off of me so that I could run sideline to sideline making plays. We were playing the U-City Lions and they had a kid named Nathan Booth. He was fast, strong and flat out scary as a tail back. He could out run you and run you over! It was my responsibility to bring him down, and in the first series of the game they were using him as a decoy and gaining yards like crazy. I knew what they were doing, I even knew the side that he was going to run to and I knew which hole he was going to hit. All I had to do was show up and make the tackle… Hut one, hut two and everything slowed down… The linemen kept the blockers off of me and I ran down the line watching Booth the whole time. They faked the ball to the other back and pitched the ball to Booth with a full head of steam. He and I were on a collision course in the six whole… both with a head of steam, man on man, heads up, and right at the point of impact, right before the collision I thought about how big he was, how fast he was, and how strong he was and I pretended to trip diving for his shoelaces. He galloped over the top of me for a fifty yard touchdown. My teammates never knew I took a dive, they all said good thing I did not hit him because he is so big. The fans never saw me fall because they were to busy watching Booth score. I had gotten away with not trying, I even convinced myself that it’s only a game… no need to get hurt. I told myself that I wouldn’t have made the tackle anyway. I blamed the other linebackers for not backing me up. I went home feeling good that I tried… But I had a coach who knew that I was better than that. At the next practice, he asked me about that play, and I began to make my excuses, and he stopped me and asked why weren’t you in that hole? He told me he was watching the entire play, and that he saw me fake and fall. He told me that if I ever dared to be great then I must not lie to myself. He told me that I had let down the team, the fans, and him as the coach, and if I ever did that again I would find myself on the bench. Needless to say I never tanked another play, and Coach Chester became a huge impact on my life.

You see a good coach knows what they are doing and seeks permission to tell the whole truth with the express desire to make you better for hearing the truth.

Team AO, who have you given permission to tell you the whole truth? And are you ready to hear it?

15 thoughts on “The Whole Truth”

  1. Hi Raymond, thank you for the post and for being transparent. The title of the post says it all. Often in life it is easier, less painful and softer to the ears to receive less than the Whole Truth. In many instances we don’t want to hear what we need to hear, we want to hear what makes us feel good. But what makes us feel good doesn’t help anyone. As adults we have assumed the role of giving the whole truth to our children and to those coming behind us because we know it will help them to grow and mature. However, oftentimes, we give little thought or dismiss the necessity of the whole truth in our own lives. The whole truth is good and wholesome for all of us because when we know the whole truth and realize that we are the project, that is when we can begin to make course corrections and to grow. Your post is truth in words and leaves little room for excuse making. As we face the brutal reality, we know that we have fallen short of our goals and must take the necessary steps to comfront our short-comings and enact a plan-do- check-adjust. If we are going to truly be the leaders we have been called to be and make a differece in this world, we must do what we say, say what we do and be willing to hear the Whole Truth. In answer to your question we have given Colby permission to to tell us the whole truth.

  2. I give Raymond and Tina permission to tell the whole truth with the express desire to make me better for hearing the truth.I am beyond ready to hear it because it’s what keeps me going! Yes I like compliments but I thrive on constructive criticism because it helps me grow.Love Ya’ll!

  3. Great post Raymond. It makes you stop and take a hard look at yourself. It’s good to receive constructive criticism delivered in a caring manner which is exactly how you’ve demonstrated it.Dee

  4. Here is my check in for Tina’s challenge…. I asked 8 times last week “have you heard of mona vie?”. I had 5 tastings and picked up 3 new numbers. I read each day for 15-20 minutes our of Magic of Thinking Big (for the 5th time) and listened to a cd 4 out 7 days (I know!! I missed a few!!). Greg and I are moving on, getting out there every evening and talking/introducing people to Mona Vie. Colby is keeping us accountable each Sunday, pushing us to go further each week. He doesn’t always say what we might like to hear, but it is always what we NEED to hear. 😉See you Tuesday!!

  5. The 4 horseman (Tommie, Jesse, Rodney, and Troy) and their wives had a calling session last night. We had 5 plans booked, 2 no’s, and 16 answering machines. Kudos to Troy for getting the most plans booked. We all set goals and will support each other in achieving them. Fired up!

  6. Team AO, we continue to see outstanding leadership from R&T. Truly they are not in the theory of leadership but the reality of leadership. I have the privelege of seeing them behind the scenes and what you have just read from Raymond is real. Everything does not always go well for the leader but he is always striving to make things well. In other words, Orrin and Chris say the leader attacks the status quo. Are we properly attacking ourselves? It looks like R&T have and I will follow this example. I just got off the phone with one of my mentors and he gave me a balanced view of my situation. I have submitted myself to his leadership and sometimes he tells me things I don’t want to hear but need to hear. He appropiatley pushes the envelope and I believe this is what Raymond is expressing.Keep in mind there are things that you are doing well and there are things you need to improve. Be balanced in your self assessment. Oh yea, and don’t forget, I’ll see you at the top.Respectfully, Dominion

  7. Micah and I introduced Mona Vie to a lady named Heather at our house tonight. Micah met her at the Hyatt Regency networking event. We were definitely a dynamic duo! We Six This perfectly! She said she has tomorrow night booked so she can’t come to the open. Micah and I encouraged her to come next Tuesday. After we Six This, I could tell she wanted to talk a little bit so I asked her about herself and found out that she is in Engineering and she is very outgoing! She said she is looking at a couple of opportunities but wants to look more into Mona Vie! She has a dream of getting out of her job and making money on continuous bases, and she is tired of meeting people that have no dreams and are ok with staying at a job with a boss over seeing them. Everything she said she was looking for lined up with what Mona Vie is!! Micah gave her “The Opportunity” cd by Matt Abraham and two other cds by Orrin and Lorie, and Chris and Teri. We also booked a follow through for Wednesday at 7pm!! I have high hopes that she will be joining our team!!Love ya’ll!

  8. I have two different guests coming out tomorrow night! Hallelujah! William, a true gentleman that I know from work is burnt out on anything MLM, but agreed to come out because of my excitement!I met Simmie (rhymes with Jimmie) while I was helping my mom with my grandmother’s moving sale. Simmie is self employed and is into working out and eating healthy. He is bringing his wife and is very excited to get to meet Team leaders like you reading this blog!Praise God that no weapon formed against the Alpha Omega team will prosper and all scheduled guests will have a clear journey without delay in Jesus’ name!

  9. Micah and Shannon, You both are on fire, and I know that the closer you follow the complete six-this process the more results you will get. And you are getting guests to Tuesday, and that fires me up.Raymond

  10. Hey Raymond & Tina,I stated that I would hold myself accountable on the blog….man how hard it is to do when you have not done all that you said you were going to do. But this time I took a different approach and decided to track it in my new calendar and let’s just say that “Thou shall not fake thyself out.” For the past week I have listened to at least 2 CDs everyday. I have made “The Opportunity” part of my daily CDs because it reminds me of what we have our hands on. I have read 15 minutes a night for 4 days. I asked, “Have you heard of Mona Vie?” 5 times (didn’t meet goal). So, it starts all over today. This week I will be reading specifically from “Attitude is Everything”. I also wanted to say thanks to Anthony, Tina, and Sharon for helping out with Mona Vie Booth in Mascoutah on Saturday. We gave out 40 samples…..We sold 1 bottle…..We got about 12 new names and numbers…..and we got some new stories for the shoebox! As for our Tasting that was scheduled for Saturday… was cancelled…I take full responsibility for not making it happen. I have so many areas to improve in and I am moving forward everyday….thanks to Tina’s daily encouragement, her firm push, and her example because she is out there kicking butt! After listening to the “Complete Professional” today, I have decided that I will allow nothing to divert me from my purpose.Today is a new day!Also, I will have guest out tonight…fired up!6-THIS4 down/11 to go!

  11. Hi Guys,I have given God full permission to tell me the whole truth. He will sometimes do it by using my children, family, friends, and my coaches in this business. I am at the point in my life that I do not want to waste time being offended over little things that will not help me to grow into the women I am supposed to be. Raymond and Tina I give you permission to tell me the whole truth and nothing but the truth in every area of my life. It sometimes may be a little uncomfortable for people to tell us those hard things and we may not want to always hear it. We must realize that God will use others to help us to see areas that we need to improve upon. I am thankful that I’m loved enough that God and the people He uses will speak into my life and not leave me in my mess. Love ya!

  12. Team Alpha Omega,I have truly enjoyed reading all of your post. As I have said for a while you all inspire me to do more and get better. I want to take this time to again lay out the challenge to our ladies. We are challenging ourselves and each other to listen to 1 CD per day, read 15 min per day, ask the question “Have you heard of Monavie yet?” once per day and once weekly to post on the blog. Those of you who hav accepted it and moved on it I know are reaping the results of more names and numbers and overall better attitude.My updaate is that I read daily and completed the Reforming Marriage book. I listened to 9 CD asked THE ? 8 times and personally booked 4 plans for the week simple because I/we had more people to call.I want to leave you all with the thought of Did my actions today take me closer to or further from my DREAMS. The answer is not as important as self-evalutaion and understanding that tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life. Let’smake it a great day.!!Love you all and lets pack it our Saturday at the seminar.Tina A

  13. Hey Raymond,Thanks for the great post on coaching, coming from someone whom I consider to be able to mentor. Of course, mentors are also humble, because they realize that they don’t know everything, and that learning is essential for personal growth. The best teachers are always the best students! Thanks for the encouraging and inspiring words, and for reminding us again of what it means to be a great coach!Lydia

  14. Tonight was awesome!! Raymond you were fantastic!I am so pumped up about this challenge! I went from listening to 1 cd a day to 2 cd’s a day, from 15 min. of reading a day to 30 mins., and from asking 1 person a day if they have heard of Mona Vie yet to 2 people!! – I do admit that I have missed a day here and there but I made sure to do extra the next day. I just can’t get enough of the cd’s and reading!! BTW – Chris Brady makes an awesome history teacher. Had he been my history teacher growing up, I would have aced the subject!!Love Ya’ll!!

  15. Tina,I accepted your challenge and wanted to report in from last week. I listened to a CD a day, asked “Have you heard of Monavie?” 5 times (fell 2 short), read 5 days during the week for at least 30 minutes each, and did a post on the blog.Thanks for the challenge Tina because it is pushing me to do more and get better.

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